My Depression Story

For the past month I have been using MySelfHelp.com.  It seems to be a good resource.  I recommend it.

For the past several months, I have kept a record of my sleep habits using the Alertness Diary.  I can’t believe how little sleep I actually get and how little time I actually spend in bed.   I seem to generally get between 5 and 7 hours during the week, and then on the weekend, I am so tired that I need to sleep a lot to pay the accumulated sleep debt.  I definitely need to improve my sleep habits.

Combined with my severe sleep apnea, I don’t get much sleep at all.

I’ve been monitoring my alertness throughout the day, using the Alertness Diary on Alertness Matters.  It’s free.  Each hour I rate how alert I am using one of four categories:

1. Alert
2. Low Energy
3. Sleepy
4. Asleep

It’s been a learning experience.  I’ve noticed how my bedtimes go in cycles.  I’ve also noticed how I don’t get as much sleep as I thought I did.  Even with the sleep apnea, I don’t spend enough time in bed.

The website, Alertness Matters, is run by Cephalon, the same company that makes Provigil.  Even though Cephalon sponsors the website, I didn’t see any ads for Provigil on the website.

I am having problems with my sleep.  Not only do I not want to sleep, but when I do sleep, I don’t get quality sleep.  I now know why.  Last month, I went to a sleep clinic and had a polysomnogram.  I was actually diagnosed with severe obstructive sleep apnea.  I even have problems with central sleep apnea.  Normally, I would go into the sleep clinic again and have for a CPAP titration, but a month ago, I had nose surgery.  I have to wait until my nose fully heals before I can get the CPAP.  In the mean-time, I must wait and remain sleepy.  At least my primary care physician prescribed Provigil, so I don’t fall asleep behind the wheel on my 45 minute drive to work.  I’ve had too many close calls that scared me silly.  I am glad I’ve never been in a wreck due to falling asleep at the wheel, but I’ve come close.

 I firmly believe that this sleep apnea is the cause of my rapid cycling of depression.  My lack of sleep tends to coordinate with my depression cycles.  The antidepressants seem to handle most of the major long-term depressions, but these rapid cycles typically last a couple of days and then go away.